From the time we are placed in the bassinet our heads are full of stories and adventures that exist only in ‘far away lands’. This introduction in life, should be enough to inform us that the preceding story is pure fantasy; but we are young, naive, full of imagination, and given to believe that if we are lucky enough, one day, we too will be in a relationship and live ”happily ever after”.
The idea of a bedtime story is excellent for many reasons it encourages family time the children are quiet it aids in the experience of language and is normally a far better alternative option to the abundance of screen-entertainment that is on offer for the new generation.
However the recurring foundational basis of such fairytales can end up in a whole range of unachievable expectations in later life when it comes to relationships and the actual world. These stories lead us to believe that there is one ‘soul mate ‘ with which a fairy story ending is attainable. They imply that true contentment is only attainable if you have companionship. All too frequently women are pictured in film as depressed and lonesome until they find their ‘prince’.
The storylines inherently suggest that ‘finding love ‘ is the battle, and that once you have – everything else will slide into place. In the meantime, in the real world, circumstances like work, wellbeing, finances, debt, children, chores, family and death, just to name a few issues, continually impact the picture wonderful life that we grew up idolising.
Fairytales frequently make the phenomenon of ‘love at first sight ‘ appear common, when in actual fact it is the exception to the rule. Such an event emphasize’s the physical sides of a relationship, and validates unachievable expectations because it simultaneously undermines closeness and mutual respect as the foundations of a genuine, loving relationship.
A great relationship allows us to embrace better versions of ourselves and motivates ordinary folk to reach astonishing outcomes. The irony may be that the tale of Cinderella, one of the famous stories about a deep and long lasting love, has given an unattainable dream, leaving us needing more rather than seeing what’s great around us
*Cinderella is a well known Walt Disney Production.
Chris Dawson is a highly qualified marriage counselling expert, helping couples resolve relationship issues. His extensive experience, of over 25 years experience, is highly sort after all around the world in his position as Clinical Director for Humaneed, a leading Marriage and Relationship Counselling Service located in Australia.
Author is amazed at all that goes into a wedding, from speeches to dresses, from favors to wedding planning.
